Types of Affairs 0

Types of Affairs

Types of Affairs

Love Affairs, Sex Affairs & Cyber Affairs

Self-esteem needs are the reasons given for man affairs. You meet your self-esteem needs through knowing, understanding and acceptance. You can enhance self-esteem through talking intimately about feelings, thoughts, and needs. When we inquire warmly and affirm each other, we meet one another’s self-esteem needs.

There are several types of affairs – and each has different motives, different behaviors, different feelings and different consequences.

The two primary categories of affairs are love (emotional) affairs and sex (physical) affairs.  Various types of affairs are divided into categories to help you distinguish between them, develop a better understanding of how and why they happen and know what to do if they do happen.

Love Affairs

An emotionally and sexually intimate bond between a married person and someone who is not his or her spouse.

Sex Affairs

A liaison between a married person and someone other than his or her spouse that involves genital contact, with little on no emotional involvement.

The feelings evoked by an affair allow diagnosis of its type. The needs met by an affair indicate its motivation, its probable duration and the degree of threat it presents to the marriage. This knowledge allows couples to relate to one another in ways that meet one another’s needs and either prevent or undermine an affair.

Cyber Affairs

A cyber affair is an intimate or sexually explicit communication between a married person and someone other than their spouse that takes place on the computer over the internet. This communication requires both parties subscribe to an on-line Internet service. About 25 million people access the Internet, so the chances of meeting someone over the Net are very high. You just select the category of Chat Room you would like to visit. The chat room categories range from “over 40” to “married and flirting” to “naked on the keyboard.”

When confronted, women find that after a little flirtatious conversation that seems benign with increasingly sexual questions and comments. Men may ask a woman for a picture or at least her profile. Men usually demand a phone number with the hope that they can talk women into a real-life affair. By far the majority of cyber affairs are sexually graphic and often crude.

Men are less shy about exploring and expressing their feelings while on-line than in person. While wives may find husbands reluctant to talk about emotions to them, these same men will, in a cyber affair, dislodge their inhibitions and write about their fleeting fantasies and intense feelings.

Women can become more sexually adventurous and explicit on-line than they would be face to face. For many women, it is an opportunity to pretend to be different than they are.

Pretending is a major them in cyber affairs. Most men say they are professionals – doctors, lawyers or accountants – and, of course, they all work out at the gym every day. And, nearly universally, they explain that if their wives liked sex, they wouldn’t be sex shopping on the Internet.

The dangers are the same as the opportunities. The desire to explore and express feelings and to be known as you would lie to be is engaging, but it is easy to begin to believe the fantasy.

Needs Met by An Affair

»Being loved
»Being needed
»Being understood
»Enjoyable risk
»Freedom/Independence
»Friendship
»Fun
»Intellectual stimulation
»Loving
»Sexual fulfillment
Love Affairs
 Love affairs have a strong emotional emphasis. They are emotionally intense and are usually sexually intimate also. They may begin as “just talking” and “just having a good time together” and evolve into a powerful bond. Love affairs end in pain and devastation for someone. Self-esteem is usually the reasons given for love affairs. There are four categories of love affairs: in love affairs, loving affairs, bridge affairs and hate affairs.
Sex Affairs
Sex affairs involve genital contact between a married person and another who is not their spouse. They are physical, with little or no emotional involvement. There are three types of sex affairs: sensual affairs, sexual adventure affairs, and sexual conquest affairs.

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